As a collaborative family lawyer I always strive to keep families out of court, especially after a parenting order has been agreed on.
Going to court is a significant expense, and often does not address immediate disputes that are occurring between parents. A new service launched last year that is such a valuable tool for high conflict co-parents to make decisions, but it’s also one so many families don’t yet know about.
It’s called Parenting Coordination, and it’s an innovative new approach to the family court system that launched Australia-wide late last year, as a way for co-parents to work together to make decisions on things they may not agree on.
Parenting Coordination
When the ink settles on an interim Court Order, that isn’t the end of making decisions as a co-parent, and often we can see families back in court over all sorts of things, from which school the child should attend, to travel plans in the school holidays. This service works to keep these things out of court, freeing up the backlogged system- particularly as we battle with the impact of COVID.
The service can be used before, during and after final Court Orders are put in place, and can be useful for more minor conflicts that can use up resources and valuable court time. It also teaches parents the skills to communicate and negotiate in a high-conflict situation. We are seeing it as a very valuable resource though after parenting arrangements are agreed on.
Parenting Coordination can be conducted online or in-person as it currently stands. Both parties need to agree to attend or can be court-ordered to attend, and they meet with the Parenting Coordinator once a month for a minimum of twelve months.
The session generally runs for a few hours and beforehand there is an agreement to discuss three issues that have arisen in the month with a view to resolving those issues in the session.
The benefit of a Parenting Coordinator is if the parties cannot agree, then the Parenting Coordinator has the ability to make a direction (non-court binding) about how the issue is to be dealt with and the parties are expected to follow it.
The other benefit is if urgent issues arise a Parenting Coordinator can be available to deal with an issue of urgency at the last minute. For example, if someone’s parent dies and the other party doesn’t want the children going to the funeral – a decision can be made then and there.
Finally, all of this extends to email monitoring, text message monitoring, wherein if there is high conflict, the Parenting Coordinator can jump in and ensure that the communication is not rude, inappropriate, and is child-focused. All of this is reportable in the event that the matter goes to court.
The biggest benefits of Parenting Coordination for kids
I am currently one of three fully trained parenting coordinators in Sydney but there are many more nationally available.
I have found that the benefits are huge, especially for children and include:
- Enhancing the child’s confidence and self-esteem.
- Increasing the likelihood of keeping two active parents in the child’s life.
- Reducing the child’s symptoms of stress as parental conflict decreases.
- Diminishing the child’s sense of loyalty binds.
- Creating a good set of ground rules which are followed by their parents surrounding communication and interaction.
Likewise, there are long term benefits to parents as well, to educate them on an ongoing basis, these include:
- Educating parents on the impact of parental conflict on their child’s development.
- Working with parents in developing a detailed parenting plan.
- Teaching parents anger management, communication and conflict resolution skills, and children’s issues during divorce.
Written by Collaborative, Family Lawyer, Cassandra.
