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As a Family Law Solicitor, I am regularly thrust into aggressive and acrimonious property and parenting proceedings. I have witnessed the soul crushing effects on clients after a barrage of letters are exchanged by the Lawyers. The stress, the nausea, the interrupted sleep, the drain, are all too common characteristics experienced by the parties. The price is draining both financially and emotionally.
As a practitioner I have become frustrated with our current system and all of its flaws. I have often found myself reflecting on whether there is a better way to fall out of love? I have found myself saying to my clients when they first come to see me, that separating can often feel like you have stepped into a whirlwind. Litigating family law proceedings can often turn that whirlwind into a cyclone.
As a Mediator I have always known about the utility in Mediating a separation. Mediation can achieve a cost effective, quick and efficient resolution of your dispute. The alternative to mediation is often having to wait two or three years just to obtain a hearing date.
Mediation always has its flaws and many clients often feel rushed and pressured into resolving their divorce.
So what then is a collaborative divorce? Collaborative Divorce allows the parties to take control of their divorce. It encourages a respectful, amicable resolution to a separation. It facilitates communication, and looks to speak to the goals of the parties both individually and collectively.
It is kind, empathetic, and respectful… and non litigious.
I have found myself spending hours immersed in literature about collaborative divorce over the last few days. I have questioned why have I not been exclusively practising in Collaborative Divorce? I feel empowered sitting with my clients, telling them about a process which allow them to consciously uncouple in a safe and encouraging environment. One that will allow them to attend their children’s wedding in the future, and greet each other without resentment and contempt. So, I’m spreading the news, and hoping that you will all keep me accountable.
I am changing the way I as an individual, practice Family Law. No longer do I wish to participate in a system that encourages litigation at the cost of a family. When it is time for me to step away from my time as Lawyer, I want to stand by a legacy that was known for resolution, for encouraging kindness, and for allowing people the space to announce that have separated respectfully.
I am grateful to an amazing group of colleagues who have shown me that there is value in speaking to my clients about their goals, their desires and not simply reading advice to them from a checklist. To those people, thank you for opening my eyes to better way. And to Clarissa Rayward, the fierce wonder woman who believes so strongly in changing the face of family law, I am so grateful to have found you my friend.
I am excited for the future in this space.
It is the way of the future, for my firm and for my clients.[/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=”35px”][vc_row_inner row_type=”row” type=”full_width” text_align=”left” css_animation=””][vc_column_inner width=”1/2″][qode_elements_holder number_of_columns=”two_columns” columns_proportion=”33_66″][qode_elements_holder_item vertical_alignment=”middle” horizontal_alignment=”left” advanced_animations=”no”][vc_single_image image=”308″ img_size=”full” style=”vc_box_circle_2″ onclick=”custom_link” qode_css_animation=”element_from_fade” link=”/meet-the-family/”][/qode_elements_holder_item][qode_elements_holder_item vertical_alignment=”middle” horizontal_alignment=”left” advanced_animations=”no” item_padding=”0 0 0 10%”][vc_column_text]
By Cassandra Kalpaxis
Director
Family and Surrogacy Law Expert[/vc_column_text][/qode_elements_holder_item][/qode_elements_holder][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=”1/2″][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
